How to Piss Off Danny Fenton
by libraluvr
Summary: "I don't have to know you well to know how to piss you off."- Dash is trying to piss Danny off. Can Danny take it? Or will he snap?


Even if you didn't know him, and everyone did, it would have been clear that Dash Baxter was in a very bad mood. Casper High's resident football star had thought that Mondays were supposed to be bad but so far his Friday had been _horrible_. First he'd woken up late, which resulted in him being late for school. Even though it was obvious he didn't want to, Lancer had given Dash a detention. Why did they even give detention for being late to homeroom? Dash didn't think it was that big of a deal, but then his coach had told him that he couldn't keep getting him out of detentions. Now he had to serve detention instead of hanging with his friends at the Nasty Burger. Not only that but Fentonia, who was _always_ late, had been on time that morning to witness his humiliation.

He'd gotten his math test back with a big, fat 42%. What made it bad was that Fenturd, who was _awful_ at math, had gotten a 76%. What made it worse was that everyone who got lower than a 70% was getting a call home. His parents would be furious. They'd told him the next time he got a bad grade he would be grounded. Not only would he not be able to hang with his friends after school today, he wouldn't be able to hang with his friends for a _while_. Then he found out he had a chemistry test the next Monday. Since he'd been skipping class lately, he didn't even know what unit they were on, so he was definitely going to fail that test too. He'd heard the Goth freak talking to the techno-loser about how they'd been helping Fenturd study and he was definitely going to pass. That had pissed him off. Why should Fentina get to pass when he couldn't?

Then he'd seen Paulina flirting with another guy. When he confronted her, she'd simply shrugged and said being with him didn't stop her from talking to other guys. Not a moment after she'd given him a smirk and walked away he'd seen Fentonia and his gang. As usual he was in the middle with the Goth freak and the techno-geek on each side. The two acted like he was the leader. As if puny Danny Fenton could lead anything. The techno-loser was engrossed in his PDA, as always. Fenturd and the Goth freak were talking.

"Seriously, Danny, I can carry my books myself. I don't need you to do it for me," she'd said. It was then Dash noticed that Fen-dork was, in fact, carrying the books she needed for her next class.

"I know, Sam. You don't need me to do anything for you," he'd replied. His tone wasn't mocking, simply matter of fact. The Goth freak blinked and slowed her pace.

"Then why…" she'd started to ask.

"Because I want to," he'd interrupted. The techno-loser's smirk told anyone watching, which Dash _was_ though he couldn't figure out _why_, that he wasn't anywhere near as focused on his PDA as he seemed. The Goth freak blushed and reached up to tug the half ponytail she always kept her hair in. Then she'd started walking more briskly and said, "Come on, then. If you're going to be walking me to class and carrying my books around we might as well get there on time."

She'd breezed past Dash with Fenton following behind like a lost puppy and the techno-geek walking behind the both of them muttering about "clueless best friends who can't see how in love they are." Dash had been furious. Fen-dork and the Goth freak weren't even _together._ He had no right to look that happy just because she said he could carry her books and walk her to class. They were best friends. He could do that anyway. And they'd walked right past him as if he didn't even exist! Him, Dash Baxter! The most popular and athletically inclined boy in Caper High! HOW DARE THEY!

While he was stewing over the insult the biggest geeks in school had given him, the late bell rang. He cursed and ran to English. When he arrived Lancer gave him a disappointed sigh, and another detention. Once again Fentina was there to witness his humiliation. Lancer split them into groups so they could annotate a poem. Dash was happy he wasn't in Fentina's group. He had Paulina, Kwan, and Star. They were the only group with four people. Dash thought his day was finally looking up. He reached for the pile of papers at the same time his girlfriend did. Their hands touched. He smiled at her but she smacked his hand away, grabbed a sheet, and turned to talk to Star. Dash frowned and grabbed his own sheet. Before he turned to Kwan he glanced at Fentonio's group. Of course he was with his loser friends.

Lancer put the papers down on his desk. Fenturd and the Goth freak reached for them at the same time and their fingers touched. Instantly they drew their hands back blushing. Fen-dork smiled at her and she smiled back. He grabbed a paper, she grabbed a paper, and they each handed the other the paper they'd gotten. The techno-loser rolled his eyes and grabbed his own sheet. Dash looked down to realize he was crumpling his own sheet in his hands. What had been the point of switching papers when they'd each had one? Again Dash was annoyed by the fact that the pair was being sickeningly sweet and they weren't even together. The final bell rang and Dash shot up with everyone else to escape the class room. The funny thing about Casper High was everybody rushed to get out of their last class, but then hung around the halls for a half hour before going to the Nasty Burger.

Before he could escape, Lancer's hand clamped down on his shoulder. "You have detention, Mr. Baxter," he reminded.

Dash huffed and dropped down in the seat closest to the door. Then something surprising happened: he had an idea. He'd had a really bad day, and part of the reason his day was so awful was because he could clearly see Fen-dork having a better one. So, why not make Fentina's day as awful as his had been? It really wouldn't be that hard. Fentonio was always an easy target; he and his friends couldn't do anything to hurt Dash back.

"Can I go get my stuff from my locker at least?" he asked. Lancer glanced up and nodded before returning his attention to his book of poems.

And that was how Dash came to be stalking the hallways looking for his prey. He looked far less graceful than a jungle cat but made up for it by looking just as murderous. Sadly, it looked as though his bad luck hadn't run out yet, because just as he had Fenturd in his sights, he tripped and face-planted on the newly cleaned floors. It was an unwritten rule that no one was allowed to laugh at Casper High's most popular student, but Sam Manson was an exception to most rules. And when Sam laughed you'd better believe her best friends Danny and Tucker were snickering, chuckling, howling, or outright guffawing right along with her. Dash was up in a second.

"FENTOOON!" he bellowed.

Danny rolled his eyes and prepared to get beaten up the blond football player. He knew there would be negative consequences for him having such a good day, but he'd thought they would be small considering what a bad week he'd had. Every single morning his parents had been in the kitchen with a new invention. He'd been smacked, slapped, slammed, knocked, fried, seared, frizzled, and zapped more times that week then he even cared to count. And not just by his parent's inventions. The ghost attacks had been almost non-stop. Not only had there been attacks before, during, and right after school hours, but during his sleeping hours.

However last night he'd actually gotten a solid six hours of sleep. _In a row_. He'd been on time to all his classes, so no detentions, and the only ghost attack had been during lunch. He found out that he'd gotten a high C on his math test and that all Tucker and Sam's extra tutoring in chemistry might actually pay off on the test Monday. The absolute best part of his day had been when Sam let him carry her books. Independent, women's and animals' rights activist, ultra-recyclo vegetarian, cliché-hating _Sam_, had let _HIM_ _carry HER books!_ If that wasn't a good day then he didn't have the faintest idea of what was.

"I wonder if he'll ever realize that you _let_ him beat you up all the time," Tucker quietly. Before Danny and Sam could say no, the group realized that Tucker hadn't been quiet enough.

"_Let_ me beat his sorry ass? Fentina couldn't beat me up if I did every single thing that would piss him off the most," Dash scoffed. Danny raised an eyebrow.

"Dash you've used so many variations of my last name I'm not sure you even know what it actually is anymore. I highly doubt you know me well enough to know what would piss me off," he said. He chalked up his boldness to his seriously awesome day.

"I don't have to know you well to know what pisses you off," Dash sneered. "Then again why should I bother explaining anything to you? You're probably just as dumb as your fatass dad, we already know you're just as damn clumsy." Dash got the reaction he was looking for when Danny lost his expression of faint amusement. The boy used to get embarrassed when people said rude things about his parents, but now it irritated him. It especially annoyed him when people said his parents didn't fit right together, though no one could say why. Dash kept talking. "You know I never really got how someone like your mom ever hooked up with someone like your dad. I mean I've seen them in action. Your mom probably would've gotten tons of ghosts by now if your dad wasn't always messing things up." Danny's blank expression became annoyed. "You know the first time I ever saw her with her hood and goggles off I totally got where Jazz got her looks from. Now I just wonder if she's as flexible as your mom is." Danny scowled and Dash continued. "You know I never did thank your sister properly for tutoring me that one time. I still have her number. Maybe I should call her up, ask her to come over to my place so _I _can teach_ her_ a few things." Danny's fists clenched. Tucker and Sam each grabbed a wrist and kept him from taking a step forward.

"Dude, don't even listen to him," Tucker said.

"Yeah. Weren't you paying attention Danny? He's_ trying_ to make you angry. Don't give him what he wants. You need to calm down," Sam chipped in. Then Dash did something that no one expected. Quick as lightning he grabbed Sam's free hand and jerked her toward him. He crashed his lips against hers just long enough for Danny to register it as a kiss before shoving her away. She crashed into Tucker who, surprisingly, was able to handle her weight and only stumbled back a couple steps instead of falling to the floor.

"Ugh. Still tastes like geek," he said gagging.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?" Danny roared. Before Dash could think, Danny's fist was flying towards him.

"STOP!" Sam shouted. Danny's fist froze half an inch from Dash's face. "Danny he's not worth it, okay? Let it go. The only thing I want you to do is step away from him. You can walk me to your house and give me some mouthwash so I can get the taste of failure out of my mouth. I'll even let you carry my stuff. Please?" It was that last word that made Danny drop his fist and back up. Sam didn't say please often, so when she did he knew she really wanted whatever she was asking for.

Danny picked up his bag, slammed his locker door closed, and started walking towards his friends. His movements were stiff and precise and it was obvious that he was still angry. Then Dash did the most idiotic thing he'd ever done in his sixteen years of life. He opened his mouth again. "I may not know you well _Fenton_ but I know your freak of a girlfriend is always trying to keep you from getting hurt. She tells you to run from a fight and you just do it. How does it feel to be a little bitch? Huh, _Dan_?"

Danny froze mid-step. Literally. One foot was above the ground when he stopped moving.

Some people spent the moment of complete silence wondering how he kept his balance. Others, who knew how much the boy _despised_ being called Dan, wondered, more intelligently, what he was going to do next.

Danny started walking again, but instead of walking away completely he simply handed his bag to Tucker before turning right back around and heading towards Dash.

"I tried, didn't I, Tucker?" Sam asked her technology-dependant friend.

"You did, Sam. You tried really hard. You even said_ please_," he responded to the Gothic female.

"I know! I never say please!" she spat the last word out as if it only had four letters.

Tucker nodded. "It's not your fault. You did everything you could. Dash just had to keep on _pushing it_."

By this time Danny had reached the blond boy. He straightened up to his full height, which, to everyone's surprise, was a full three inches taller than Dash and said in a pleasant voice, "Congratulations Dash. You have succeeded in pissing me off." Instantly phones were out and recording; no one noticed that Tucker had been recording from the start.

The smirk on the football player's face disappeared instantly after Danny punched him in the stomach. As he bent forward, Danny's knee came up and smashed into his jaw. Dash reeled backwards barely catching his balance in time to avoid falling to the floor on his ass. He lunged for Danny who simply sidestepped at the last minute and slammed a fist down on his back so Dash only succeeded in falling to the floor on his stomach. Dash was up in a second and throwing a punch the next. Danny caught the punch in his left hand and threw his own right hook at Dash's jaw. Once his fist made contact Danny let go of Dash's fist and the blond boy was once again thrown to the floor. His head hit the ground with a distinct thump. It only took him a couple more moments to get up this time. He tried to throw another punch, but Danny sidestepped. Dash couldn't stop his momentum and tripped forward. Instead of letting Dash fall to the floor again Danny quickly turned so that his front faced Dash's side. Then he shoved him in to the lockers. As he slid to the floor it looked like Dash was out for the count.

Danny once again turned towards his friends, but when he was halfway there he noticed their eyes widen and sensed Dash behind him. He moved his head sideways so the punch flew over his shoulder. He then grabbed Dash's arm with his right hand, elbowed him a couple times in the stomach with his left arm, and then flipped him over his shoulder. Dash landed on his back, his head making another distinct thump. Dash struggled onto his knees, then to a crouching position, then to his feet. He had to blink a couple times before he could focus on Danny. Then he lunged for the black-haired boy. Danny side-stepped yet another punch, but this time he bent his knees slightly and held his arm straight out. Dash's chest slammed into it and his feet slid forward while his upper body fell back. Another spectacular fall, another distinct head thump. Danny once again moved so that his front faced Dash's side. Then he kicked the boy to the other side of the hall. He walked over to the blond, grabbed the front of his shirt, and hefted him up against the lockers.

"Playtime's over, Dash, my boy," Danny growled. "I'm not going to _let_," he hissed the word, "you beat me up anymore. If you call me Dan _one more time_, I'm going to give you a black eye. If you _ever_ talk smack about my family _again_, I'm going to punch you in the mouth so hard you'll need _dentures_. And _if you ever, IF…YOU…EVER…_touch _my… girl…_ _AGAIN_… I'm going to break _all_ of your fingers and _both_ your wrists _one…by…one. Got it?" _

Dash was pretty much out but he managed to moan, "Got it."

Danny released his grip on Dash's shirt and watched as he slid to the ground. He didn't speak but his expression said it all. He thought Dash was totally pathetic.

Danny turned and once again started his journey towards his friends. Tucker held out his bag and he grabbed it and swung it over his shoulder.

"Your girl, huh?" Sam asked. In that moment everyone expected the fierce boy before them to revert back to shy, clumsy Danny Fenton. However they would be surprised once more as Danny maintained his cool composure.

He raised an eyebrow and stared at Sam until she looked down. Then he said, "You call Tucker and me your boys."

Sam shook her head. "It's," she paused and everyone knew she was about to say it was different, but it wasn't really. She shook her head again and said, "It's Tucker and _I_."

Danny smirked, and he looked more like a badass than ever. "Tucker and me. Tucker and I. It doesn't negate the claim." He reached out, snagged her hand, and pulled her forward. He slipped her bag off her shoulder and onto his own. "_You are my girl."_ Every female in the immediate vicinity, including the teachers who were _just_ showing up, swooned at the raw possessiveness and downright sexiness of his voice. Sam looked like she was about to faint. Then Danny smiled. After the last smirk he'd given, his smile was disarmingly sweet with a trace of its usual goofiness. He laced their fingers together. Sam looked like she was about to collapse.

"So, my house? For mouthwash?" he asked. Since Sam was basically a puddle of ectoplasm he had to start pulling her towards the doors.

Sam nodded dazedly. "To get the taste of failure out of my mouth," she agreed. Then she stopped walking. Danny turned to look at her. "You're still holding my hand." She said this as if she was informing him of the fact.

One coal-black brow rose and blue eyes filled with amusement. "I know," he replied. Sam's cheeks turned bright red as she looked down. Her free hand went up to tug at her ponytail. Then she must have decided that this was just Danny being friendly because she nodded decidedly, her cheeks returned to their normal fair color, and she said, "You are such a dork." Still, everyone couldn't help but notice that when she started walking again, she didn't let go of his hand.

Tucker walked behind them muttering about "clueless best friends who _still_ don't know how in love they are with each other."

Dash's last thought before he slipped into unconsciousness: _Fridays are the worst days ever._

**A/N: Okay, so this is my first fanfic ever. I'm not sure I did a good job. I know I totally screwed up the tenses in the beginning when Dash was thinking about how his day had been. The part in between the beginning and when he was in the hallways again was him thinking about his day. I don't believe in some students getting preferential treatment so I took that away from him. We all know Paulina is a skank I just made him see it. I decided to give Danny a good day so Dash would have to work harder to make him snap. We all know why Danny doesn't like for people to say his parents aren't right together. Vlad! I remember from one episode that Dash had a crush on Jazz and I used the words from the kiss in "Fanning the Flames." I really wanted to have some DxS fluff so I added most of it at the end there. That was the first fight scene I've ever written so I don't know if I did a good job. I didn't think Dash would be smart enough to think he should've kept his mouth shut so I had him blame it on the day. I'm sorry if the italics don't make sense. I was trying to show how I thought they would emphasize the words.**

**I know Danny's kinda OOC but I wanted to show him stepping up and Sam liking it so Dash would compare it to his own relationship with Paulina. Plus I kind of feel like after winning a fight with all the adrenaline rushing and pride flowing he would be bolder. Especially if it was against someone who Sam had watched beat him up and someone who had kissed Sam against her will**

**I'm thinking of doing a sequel to tie up loose ends. Like does Sam ever get her mouthwash? What does Tucker do with that recording? Why was he recording in the first place? What's everybody else gonna do with their recordings? Is Danny gonna get in trouble for beating the shit out of Dash even though Dash totally deserved it? Questions, questions, and more questions.**

**So I'd really like your opinion on: if you liked it, if you didn't like it, and if I should do a sequel.**

**Sorry this note turned into an essay. Please review. No flames please. I'm really new at this.**


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